Beauty: It's Undefinable
For a good part of my teenage life, and well into my early 20s, I considered skinny to be pretty, as after all that is the conventional wisdom. Skinny girls with big boobs, flat stomachs, no thighs, rock-hard abs and arms that don’t jiggle are perfect. Oh and you must be a size 2 to be desirable, right?
HA, I laugh so hard at myself for believing I ever thought that way, and I laugh even harder and somewhat pity those that still do think that way. I mean c’mon, we are only human. Why must everyone have to fall into a perfect barbie doll physique category?
The thing is, which I’ve finally come to realize after far too long: beauty comes in all different shapes and many, many different sizes.
But, and trust me on this one, inner beauty and confidence in oneself is the most beautiful of them all, and it really does show. I know of girls who may be a size 2 with gorgeous faces and perfectly formed bodies who act bitchy, snobby and self-conceited about their looks, whom by that point I consider them not so pretty anymore. In fact, people like that go down about 10 notches in my book. Yes, maybe the drunk dude at the bar will want to take them home, but being considered beautiful and a keeper? Um, No.
Then there are young, peachy women I know who are sizes 10, 12, 14, 16+ and are downright beautiful to me, and you know why? They carry themselves well, smile a lot, walk with confidence and are happy with the body they have. They simply know how to work it. And that to me is sexy, and trust me, guys think so too.
I used to be so self conscious in how I looked, constantly comparing myself to the skinnier, prettier, bigger-boobed girl, which in turn would just lower my confidence even more, prompting me to hold back. If I was out at a bar and saw a good looking guy talking to some little blonde, I’d tell myself, “She’s much hotter than me…I’m not even going to try.”
But now I realize, why bother thinking like that? It’s strenuous and downright stupid. I am who I am, I’m healthy and most importantly I am finally happy with the way I look and feel.
I realize now that there is no “perfect girl” or “perfect body.” Everyone is soooo different, which makes us beautiful in our own little way.
All my friends are beautiful to me (flat chested, skinny mini, big thighs, long legs, freckled, no butt, big butt, large breasted, etc.) because I value their personalities, confidence and way they carry themselves, not just because they are pretty to look at (while they are that as well).
It just saddens me to see beautiful women become so hard on themselves because they think they aren’t “conventionally beautiful.”
Well, it’s time to stop that today and take a deep look at yourself on the inside, letting everyone see what a great catch you truly are.
September 30th, 2009 at 3:17 am
This is so true Rach and I love this post and i'm glad you wrote about it! Everyone has their own individual beauty and its a shame the conventional portrayal of beauty makes us all wish we could change ourselves in one way or another.. keep up the good writing girl!