Healthy Chicks

[college roommates. just because we don’t see each other every day doesn’t mean I don’t think about ya]

Last night I had a long, hearty session of Girl Talk with my best friend from college. No, not the band although they are great too, particularly this song. Rather, we had a long, raw, honest, full-fledged, hilarious catch-up session. Just us, two girls telling it how it is. It all started off with our take on the Bachelor Season Finale and After the Final Rose bit – what is up with Brad and Emily? There is definitely some tension in the house! Then our discussion quickly led to family, friends, our jobs, and the latest relationship updates, and my friend said something that really stood out to me. “Rach I’m just so happy you finally have a boyfriend  after all these years. You were always meant to be a girlfriend and I always knew you’d be a great one. You used to do the cutest ‘girlfriend’ things for me…that’s the kind of friend you are. I bet you spoil him rotten”

She’s right. During my single years, I definitely played the “girlfriend” role to all of my friends. In fact, I still kind of do. I cook them surprise dinners. I write little post-it notes to them when they are feeling upset, and stick it on their walls. I get sad when a friend is upset, but share their joy when they are high on life. I just love to love. And I suppose that’s the role I’ve taken in a friendship: the lover, the giver. It’s probably partly because it’s in my Cancer The Crab nature. Emotional and loving. Yup, that’s me in a nut shell.

Then I started thinking about the roles of all friendships. Not everyone is going to be an emotional lover like I am, and trust me that’s a good thing. If we were all the same, relationships – of all kinds – would never work. Growing up, I was always the girl who had few very close friends, as opposed to many good friends. But, as I get older, I’m beginning to gain friendships every day…some who I may not see very often, and some who I met out on a whim, but still friends nonetheless. And I’m beginning to cherish these many, many friendships I’ve collected over the years.

I’ve realized it’s like having your very own library of friends! Just as there are all different genres of novels to read depending on your mood, there are all different types of friends, each as special as the next. There’s the friend who tells you that yes, that dress does make you fat, and then there’s the friend who tells you that you look gorgeous…always. There’s the friend that tells you over and over again to stop over-analyzing and that he is totally into you, and the one who tells you to get over it because he’s just not that into you. There’s the friend who buys you a gallon of ice cream when you had a bad day, and the friend who throws a bottle of vodka in your face and says “Take this…we’re going out.” There’s those who are brutally honest with you when you need it most, and those that stretch the truth as to not hurt your feelings. There’s those who listen to all of your problems, and those who talk your ear off with advice. There’s friends you only see once or twice a year but it’s still the same as when you left off last, and friends you see every single day of your life. There’s the funny friend, the caring friend, the rational friend, the crazy friend and the soothing friend.

There’s a friend for every situation, someone there for you in sunshine and in rain. So while yes, I may have a boyfriend now, I’m still going to continue playing the “girlfriend” role to all of my many friends as I always have. Because guess what? When it all comes down to it, friendships are one of the most important things in your life and well, why screw those up?

What role do you play in a friendship? Do you have a few close friends or many good friends? I’d love to hear your take on this!

XoXo,